Bonifacio, Corsica —

I think that we both hit a low point today. I know that a lot of people envy us for having a job that demands that we cruise around Europe, looking for extraordinary locales, enjoyable exercise, unforgettable meals and pampering lodging. I mean, how grueling can that be?

The goal of our Corsican traverse has been the Alta Rocca, a group of villages that nestle amidst thick forests, high up in the hills on the southern part of the island. In the Lonely Planet guide, the Alta Rocca is described as, “Pure magic. Like an addictive drug, once you’ve had a hit of its bountiful offerings, you’ll crave a hell of a lot more.” – Not.

After stomping between villages for a day, we found the terrain surprisingly difficult, views nonexistent, the towns a bit dowdy and restaurant menus dominated by pizza. It was a clear strikeout.

So, on to Sartene. Here’s what we are led to expect. “A slice of the real Corsica. With its narrow alleyways that twirl you unexpectedly into quaint nooks and crannies, its high granite walls and its tall townhouses, the old city will make you feel you’re floating through another time and space. The elegant architecture combines with the natural setting to create an unrivaled ambience.” – Not.

Town fathers have made the mistake of leaving the one main street of the old town open to traffic and cars are parked high up on the sidewalks on both sides of the street making it impossible for pedestrians to use them. The remaining roadway is barely wide enough to navigate through with our car. It’s nerve wracking for us and I feel sorry for the local shoppers who must scamper back and forth between the bumpers of the parked vehicles to let us pass. Of those “quaint alleyways”, I counted exactly eight on our city center map, some as short as 30 meters. It was here, stuck in traffic and making life impossible for those on foot that my soul screamed out for a release from Lonely Planet promises.

Note to the two guys who put this edition together: I’ll have what you’re having. If you ever make it to the mainland, stumble across any Provencale village, enjoy a bottle Gigondas or have a taste of perfectly seasoned Brie, I think you can safely go off your meds. Of, course you won’t be able to write about it because you’ve already used up all your superlatives on Corsica. Note to everyone else: We’ve used LP guides many times and have found them very helpful. This one was a bit of an exception.

One last stop, Bonifacio, at the very southern tip of the island. Bonifacio is full of narrow alleyways that twirl you unexpectedly into quaint nooks and crannies. From the sea, the view of it perched atop its rugged white cliff is unique. It is probably one of the most photogenic villages you will ever encounter. It’s a once in a lifetime experience. ALL OUR SUPERLATIVES.

But now it is getting smaller as the ferry pulls away. In an hour we will be in Sardinia.